Park this Rig on American Idol

The Top Ten Motor On…

I’ve decided American Idol is my current guilty pleasure. It presents such a departure from the rest of my life. So about last night…well darling, if you didn’t tune in, allow me to summarize:

Winning, while typically the result of exceptional skill sometimes comes by way of default; meaning that your opponent simply did not bring his or her ‘A’ game.

What the heck happened? Several of the show’s best contestants simply fell apart at the seams last night. Here’s how it all went down. I’ve added a star system, like in Orion’s belt, from zero to three stars, three being the best.

1. First up was M.K. with excellent pink hair and a strong start, singing my most favorite “Pink” song. Then her performance went sideways. I hope because of this one gaff, folks don’t send her packing. She has a great sound, although, her demeanor during the remainder of the program, will likely land her in the bottom three.

2. Dexter, sorry country dude, I was not digging this song choice. Even when Florida Georgia Line sings “Cruise”, the song is little more than a repetitive, monotone verse. Of course, this is true of most top ten hits, so that is the challenge. Dexter may be cruising to the bottom three.

3. Jena sang “Clarity” with authority and nailed it. With her unique sound, she pulled out a fabulous performance.** Two stars!

4. Alex, my favorite throwback, sang an up-tempo version of “Story of my Life”, which was a nice surprise since he tends to slow things down too often.**Two stars!

5. Malaya’s rendition of the Bruno Mars song, “When I was Your Man,” was strong, confident and emotional. ***Three stars! Loved it!

6. Caleb, I love you man, I just wasn’t Gaga over your song choice. Caleb can sing any song and make it his own so why did he choose that song? * One star

7. C.J. is a sweetheart but his tone was off throughout the entire tune. Looking in my crystal ball I see, C.J. in the bottom three.

8. Jessica mesmerized with her take on “Pumped up Kicks.” Although, I have to say, now that I’ve finally heard the lyrics to this deeply disturbing song, I won’t be humming it anymore. Kids, just because any song with a good beat and a mumbled catch phrase can capture America’s interest, does not mean that it should. Good job Jess anyway.***Three stars!

9. Majesty, held her own, with an often too quiet “Wake Me Up”. She’s still one of my top picks but I am not sure this song kept the crowd awake.*One star.

10. Sam, America’s heartthrob, sang “We Are Young” with perfection. Is it possible to be too perfect? America will decide.**Two stars!

Of course, I’m just a fan, so what do I know????

I was very happy to see Jennifer Lopez take the gloves off on the judging. She and Keith have both mastered what I’ll call the ‘pump up, let down’, which is when you say something nice to someone right before you release the hammer. Bang!

Although I still don’t really hear Keith when he talks, it’s all just butterflies and unicorns. I’ve noticed he has a ‘tell’, when he begins his comments with “how are you tonight, baby?” you know it’s not going to be pretty, even if it still sounds nice. Sometimes, I could swear Keith is even saying the exact same thing as Harry, but Harry receives a barrage of boos from the crowd and Keith gets a new paper audience sign that says, Hug me Keith. It was great fun watching ‘the boys’ trade personas. But even while acting as Harry, when Keith spoke, it was all butterflies and unicorns again.

The show has an awesome new vibe, but what’s up with Ryan Seacrest? He’s not one of the show’s producers, but he acts like the rich kid who throws a party and then every other minute reminds everyone that he paid for the beer. At least Simon kept him in line.

Sometimes I miss Simon, his arrogance was oddly attractive, but it was a distraction how everyone hated him so much. Simon laughed all the way to bank. I guess being hated pays off unless you are trying to become the next American Idol.

Good luck top ten!

Where’s the American Idol for Writers?×658-650×375.jpg

Are you hooked on American Idol? While I am normally a B & E watcher (beginning and end only), this season I am totally hooked. I’m not sure if it’s the pool of talented wannabe’s or the new judges or both.

It’s not that prior years haven’t produced amazing talent, but this year seems more diverse. There is also an influx of what I like to call the quirky element. I like that.

So far, among the ‘boys’ my favorite is Caleb Johnson with his edgy, rocker style. He reminds me of younger version of the famous ‘Meatloaf’ lead singer Marvin Lee Aday. On the quirky side is Alex Preston, who gave a flawless performance. Then there was the booming and mesmerizing voice of Malcolm Allen.  Who will win? It’s anyone game at this point. Every one of the top ten ‘boys’ brings something unique to the stage.

There is an equal amount of talent on the ‘girls’ side. My favorites run from Majesty Rose who just makes you want to dance, to Kristen O’Connor who dared sing an Adele song and nailed it, to Jena Irene who rocked the Rolling Stones anthem “Paint It Black”, in a spectacular new way. I would love to hear her sing a few Heart tunes because she could handle a Wilson sister’s song. Still I really like Jessica Meuse as an overall performer and my quirky awards go to MK Nobilette and Malaya Watson who are just so interesting to watch.

If you aren’t already tuning in you can catch the recap of them all at

The other irresistible part of the this years show are the judges.

Jennifer Lopez is back as America’s darling. She’s so sweet, and a seemingly accessible star. After all, she’s just like you and me…only famous, wildly talented and gorgeous. We ignore all that because she could be the woman next door, really, couldn’t she?

Randy Jackson is back, but in a whole new capacity.

Then there’s Keith Urban. In a word, HOT! My only problem with Keith is that as soon as he starts speaking, I don’t hear a single word he says because I’m completely spellbound by his accent.

Thank goodness for Harry Connick Jr. who I think is one of the most qualified judges of all time with his background as not just a singer, but also a musician and an actor. He’s reminiscent of a ‘real movie star’ from back in the day when celebrities were role models and not tabloid fodder. Plus, I adored him in ‘Hope Floats.” *SIGH* To the studio audience I want to say stop “booing” him! Seriously? Leave the man alone! He speaks the truth! He can’t love everybody like Jen and Keith or there would be no reason to watch the show.

So, to my original point, where is the American Literary Version of Idol?

Where are the aspiring writers from all over the country, reciting sonnets or flash fiction?

We could do this people!

As for judges, how about:

  • Clive Cussler, Harlan Coben, or James Patterson for Thrillers
  • Maya Angelou for Poetry
  • Stephen King or Dean Koontz for Horror
  • Danielle Steel or Nora Roberts for Romance
  • Sue Grafton, Mary Higgins Clark or Janet Evanovich for Mystery
  • George R.R. Martin or J.K. Rowling for Fantasy
  • Sorry folks, we’d probably have to omit the Erotica category if the show airs on prime time!

What a panel this could be! Of course, it would be hard for the contestants to compete across multiple categories and some would say, “I can’t write on demand!” Even though, it would be interesting to see who could.

The only remaining questions are:

Would it make good television?


Would anybody watch?